Behavior Management Update

For this current placement, it is no secret that behavior management has been a struggle for me.  I would like to update you on the current situation in my classroom, as advice, research, and common knowledge have helped change the situation over the past week.  First of all, thank you to everyone for the comments and advice, I love receiving it and find much of it to be helpful, so thank you!

If I were in this classroom long term, or if this were my own classroom, there are many strategies that I would try.  But since my situation is very short term and the current classroom policies must stay in effect, I have quite a few issues standing in my way.  So every day, I tried to pick an idea to try, and force myself to stick with it the entire day, weighing the positives and negatives.  As of now, I have continued this entire week, trying my best to connect with students on a more personal level, and make the behavioral situation change based on mutual respect and understanding.  Dr. BC mentioned the idea of talking to the students, and explaining how I come from a different culture and try to create a sense of understanding there.  And that is exactly what I tried.  I have been talking to them about how their behavior sends a message.  I have been able to link some of the morning devotions in with this as well, which has been quite helpful.  But while they seem to hear me for 2 minutes, nothing seems to change come 10 minutes later.

Then today, I feel as though I had a tiny breakthrough.  I had had it, I was tired, my voice is gone, and I was feeling ill.  So I just stood there, mustered up the energy, and yelled, quite loudly, I might add.  I was a little scared of my own voice J.  And I finally got their attention, I even smacked down a book on the table of usually well behaved students.  I had them all in a slight state of shock.  I was feeling very defeated, and I just stood in front of them for about a minute, making eye contact with each student.  I then asked them why every time Mrs. Mudau leaves the room they think they can act however they want.  I said that it seriously hurts me when they act that way.  I have so many fun things I want to do with them, but when they stab me in the heart like this, we just can’t do anything fun together.  I didn’t have to fakely say that I was disappointed, or try to guilt trip them.  Rather, my feelings and body language showed I was quite sincere, and I know the kids could feel it.  Children can see right through you, and know exactly when something is fake or when it is genuine.  I had a few kids staring at the floor, feeling a little ashamed, some kids not caring, and others coming up to give me hugs, which made me laugh inside.  But one girl, the only non-african student in the entire school came up to me, tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Kelly, Mrs Mudau beats us, and you don’t.  That’s why they don’t listen.”  It felt nice to hear it put so simply.  So I asked if it would help if I would just beat them, if that would solve our problems.  An overwhelming “NO!” came out of each student, so I sat and laid down a few ground rules for when I am in charge.  We have one hand signal, all students must have their hands cupped behind their ears when I need them to listen.  We’re still practicing to make this work J.  But it’s a start, right?

So, nothing is really fixed, but I think my relationships with the students are growing and deepening.  Over time, I want to continue to gain their respect and trust, and build a positive classroom environment in that way.  So again, thank you for the support, I still will love to hear ideas and thoughts.  As for now, though, this is the only path that seems to have made any progress, so I’m sticking with it and having fun with it also.